When Life Gets Too Busy
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What do you do when life gets too busy? Over the past few months I have been thinking about all the things I do and what things I can eliminate to make life easier. But every time I go over it all in my head, there is nothing at all that I want to eliminate. I want to do it all. Everything I do, I absolutely love doing. Here is a list that does not include daily chores, appointments, and taking care of the baby.
You might say. “Wait, facebook is NOT a necessity!” But I say in this case it is.
I have my personal page which I use to keep up with family and friends. Being in the military, a lot of times this is the only way to keep up with my friends and family and let them keep up with my family.
Blog Fan Page:
This takes some work to keep up with, check stats, and answer comments. I keep up with it so I can have a better blog relationship with my readers.
Home Business Fan Page:
I work from home selling Lia Sophia Jewelry. Having a fan page helps me promote my business.
Military Wives Group:
Two years ago, I started a group on facebook called Wives at Robins AFB for wives stationed there. I plan monthly lunches and from there a Mommy & Me group was also started for wives. I set up a Bible study for married couples or for those or want to come alone and post other events as they come along. I also try to send out a monthly message with events and questions that come up.
Key Spouse Group:
I am a Key Spouse for my husband’s squadron. I started a group on facebook specifically for the spouses in the squadron. I post events happening and updates as well.
This too is not a priority, but it is something I want to keep up with if I ever want to become a writer later on. Right now I am doing the bare minimum with this blog which is much less than I would like. I post when I can at least once a week. But I do not have the time to answer comments although I read each and every one. I also don’t have much time to read other people’s blog either, and that is part of the whole blogging experience which is something I really enjoy as well. The point is I do what I can but I still do not have enough time to do what I should be doing.
I have four different email addresses that I have to keep up with on a daily basis. I am not sure how many emails I get in one day, but it’s a lot.
I have two personal email addresses. One I use constantly and the other I just made as a professional email, I don’t use it very often.
As a Key Spouse I was told I needed a separate email to communicate with the squadron spouses and the First Sgt. I keep up with that and send out updates and events through that.
I have an email for my blog. I was having all my comments and communication from my blog going to my personal email, but it got to be too much, so now I have a separate email so I can keep track of who I have replied to and who I haven’t yet. Plus answer emails about PR and other things.
Wives of faith
I write articles for www.wivesoffaith.org and help moderate in the forums.
I am a moderator and just try to keep up with the posts written and start new topics and such.
I also write and submit articles for the site when I can, most are the same ones posted here eventually.
I am currently posting a weekly Bible Study (Power of a Praying Wife) there.
Now, I know what your are thinking that I probably spend way too much time online, and I probably do and I have been cutting back some recently. But not only do I do these things online, but I also have to keep up with them on a daily basis. Not only do I post all those things on facebok, but I also attend the events, and make sure they are going smoothly. I have to make monthly calls and plan events for the squadron as a Key Spouse and also attend other events happening within the squadron. I am constantly sending emails with the people from the squadron, the first Sgt. and anyone else. My home business take up a lot of time too, which lately it has been falling to the wayside. I have to make packets, print out tons of papers, go and talk at parties, and all the other things I have to do to keep up with my business.
On top of all this I also work in the nursery at church twice a month. Sundays and wednesday nights are church. Thursdays nights are Bible study and Friday mornings are mommy and me group. Around all that I take Adam to appointments, go grocery shopping, pick up prescriptions, go to the bank and run various other errands.
Maybe it’s just me, but I see all these moms who do tons more things and seem to have it together and I just don’t know how they do it. They can do tons of stuff on top of three kids and a deployment and still keep up with their house. Or so it seems anyways. I just feel like I can’t do it all anymore. I want to drop maybe one or two things and start concentrating on my family and the house. I have been really convicted lately about doing my part as a wife and mom and I want to do better at it.
A lot of the things I do however are things I do not want to give up. I enjoy doing each and everything I listed and it’s hard to pick and choose what not to do. I love having a group on facebook for the wives and I love keeping up with that. Being a Key Spouse is busy, but at the same time I don’t want to let anyone down. My home business is fun and a lot of work. I want to make money but is it worth it? My blog and writing is part of my ministry I love doing it and love helping and encouraging others. I also want to use it to further my career. So you see my dilemma? All these things I love doing and do not want to give up.
I thought being busy was going to be the best. I don’t like just sitting at home alone and doing nothing. I like to be out and having something to do. Everyone says keep busy while your husband is deployed etc. Well I think I have enough to do, should he deploy anytime soon. While I may look like the mom in the picture above trying to juggle everything she does, I want to look like he mom in the picture below.
I guess you could say I am afraid to let go. I am afraid to look weak and afraid that if I don’t keep busy that my life will fall apart. I don’t know why, but that is how I feel. What do you do when life gets too busy?
(*DISCLAIMER: I do not want people to think that all I do is sit around the house and not attend to my baby or anything else. That is not true. I spend time online while the baby is napping or at night when he is in bed. During the day I can post and check most things from my phone in a matter of a few second so while it seems like I may be on all the time I really am not. I do enjoy playing with Adam and spending time with my husband.*)
Pray 🙂 The times that I've felt overwhelmed, something that really helped me (when I remembered to do it) was to pray and give everything to God, simply turn everything over to Him and go from there. Not always, but often things would simply fall into place without my having to really do anything. He's got a plan for you too, and it's a good one. 🙂
One word for you: Delegate. You are a great leader and people follow you. The success of this blog and all the other pages is proof. So now that things have grown astronomically, you should delegate. Continue to be the leader, but get others to pitch in. The wives page is a fantastic resource and helped me out SOOO much when we moved here. But you won't always be at this base. So perhaps you can find a close friend to help you out with this page and share the responsibilities. Likewise, if you are double booked for events, the other could stand in. You are a young couple and this is your first base. It definitely won't be your last, so this is something you will have to consider sooner or later anyways. As for those who appear to have it all in place- believe me NO ONE does. What is seen and what really is are two entirely different things. And here is a secret about deployments- you can totally slack on housework and no one will yell at you for it! <3 smile. It will all work itself out.
I agree with the two previous comments… pray and delegate. You may not have to give up doing the things you love if you ask one or two people to "share the load" with you. I would pray about who to ask and I would also pray about maybe dropping something. It's hard to think you may have to let something you love go but sometimes you have to do it. I think we can get too busy doing good things. Yes, there are other women with more kids who seem to accomplish more with their time. I struggle with this too. But as Maddy has grown older I see the difference. She allows me more time to get things done now than she did last year. Babies Adam's age require a lot of attention. You are a good mom and you give him the attention he needs but it is tiring and doesn't leave much spare time. People with older kids are busy don't get me wrong… they amaze me! But it is somewhat easier at times to take care of a 4 year old. The season of taking care of babies and toddlers is taxing on moms, it's a joy for sure, but it doesn't leave us time to do things that other women can do. So, I would definitely pray about delegating or possibly letting something go. You wouldn't have to let it go forever, but just until you are able to focus more.
I also think that most women probably struggle with this… no one has it altogether. 🙂
I think it is great to have a full plate and I think God gives us the things in our life to keep us busy, but it is important to first make sure we keeps those things in priority, which I know you do 🙂 I have learned to take life one day at a time. Its ok to stay busy, but don't think about everything all at once. Focus on each task while you are doing it and enjoy it, and then move on to the next. If you focus on everything at once, it is easy to feel overwhelmed, or too busy all the time! 🙂
Holy cow! You sure do have a lot going on! I don't know how you do it all. I have no advice for you besides what the others have said! Sorry! 🙂
Ok hard truths girl….just because you enjoy them, doesn't mean it's your season for them. God calls you to be wife and mother first after being his daughter. You are doing a lot and there's no way you're able to give even 50% of what you could if you were only doing say 2 or 3 of them. There are lots of things we all enjoy and want to do, but we can't do it fully and completely and here's another thought….you're possibly stealing someone else's ministry because YOU want to do it. As a few of the other commentors said…delegate.
God did not make us to be superwomen, I think that lie is straight from satan.