My Two Biggest Fears (part 2)
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It’s been almost a month since I posted about one of my biggest fears that I had of giving a big graduation speech back in high school. Now, I want to talk about another fear that I have also been afraid of my whole life. Many of you moms, are probably going to think I am so silly, but this has seriously been something I have worried about for a long time. Now that in ten weeks or less it is going to happen, I am working on not being too nervous about facing this fear.
My Fear of Giving Birth
Yes, I know it sounds crazy, but I have always been afraid of this. When I was little, I would tell my mother that I was never going to have my own kids. She would ask me why and I told her I was afraid of how much it would hurt. She would tell me every time that I would change my mind when I was grown up. As I grew up I still had that same fear. I always thought I would adopt instead of having my own kids. Then when I got to college and actually met a man I wanted to marry, my thoughts started to change. Of course I wanted to have my own children with this man! It didn’t matter what I would go through I wanted to have kids!
Now that I am pregnant and getting towards the end of my pregnancy, I am getting more than a little nervous about the whole birth experience. What will it be like? How bad will it hurt? What if I have a panic attack? (I don’t deal with anxiety or nervousness very well). I am also afraid of having everything “out there” if you know what I mean. I know everyone says that it won’t matter when the time comes, but it is a huge fear for me right now. I am on the shy side and modest, and just thinking about what is going to happen makes me cringe! I keep trying to have the attitude that “I can do this!” But I have a feeling that it’s all going to fall apart as soon as I go into labor.
I am taking birthing classes with my husband starting next week, and I am hoping that helps me and prepares us both a little bit more for what is coming. But I need some advice, what are some things that you have done or will do to get through the birthing experience? How do you stay calm?
Just don't think about any of that now. Read info but don't watch any videos. And pray and meditate. The more nervous you are the harder you will make it on yourself. I had two without any drugs and was fine both times…I had my mom and mom in law and steven there in the room with me…it helped
love you,
Denise
Kathryn- You will be fine. With your supportive husband you will do great. My only advice is not to think things up or have expectations. Because anything can happen and not everything goes to plan. You will do fine as every woman with a kid! 🙂 ANd the hospital staff will take great care of you, they have seen it all. And if your in pain you can get good medication, there is no shame in that 95% of women get the epidural.
About the modesty. HA! You will not be thinking about that. Instead you will be focusing on getting through your contractions and at the end you will be focusing on giving birth. Trust me, none of that will come to mind.
And in the end you will have your son and it will be all worth it. 🙂
-Bri
Oh I hear you. I am a little nervous about giving birth again and been through it 2 times before. It can be painful but it is also beautiful. Kinda like when people run a 10K or something. It is all worth it in the end. You will be fine. The #1 thing is to have a good support system with you. And know that labor will not last forever and you get a beautiful baby boy out of it 🙂
Ok so I am totally petrified of giving birth and I am about a month closer to it than you are so if I can do it and blog about it hopefully I will be able to encourage you! I keep telling myself that people have babies all day every day, that its only one/two days of pain in my WHOLE life which makes it seem less daunting and that every hour/pain/push is closer to the end and holding the baby. Don't get me started though on what I will be like if I go into labor with my husband still in Iraq..thats a different story!
I think going to childbirth classes prepared me SO MUCH! I was so thankful to have gone! As for everything being 'out there' — I know for a while I kept pulling the sheets over my knees, but after the pain hit, I didn't care about anything but getting that baby out! 😉 You will be fine, sweetie, PROMISE!
You are going to do great! And the short amount of pain will be so worth it when you hold that handsome little man in your arms 🙂 And don't worry about letting it all hang out.. your doctor has seen a million of them.. hey you've seen one you've seen 'em all. LOL 🙂
I'm in the same boat as you. I'm a bit afraid as well. I'd definitely like to go naturally, even; but, if I think about it logically, I'm pretty certain I'll want the epidural.
As of right now, I'm trying not to focus on that particular day and all that it entails. I think that since I'm such a planner I'm more concerned that we'll forget something that we need while in the hospital (hence my most recent Twitter/Facebook status, haha).
Either way, when I do think about giving birth I just remember that the doctors and nurses at the hospital are all trained for this and know what they're doing. Plus, like others have said, it's just for one day (hopefully) then it's all over!
My birthing class taught me a little bit and it probably helped me to feel more prepared. However, I think that class scared me worse than anything else. They showed us a video… ugh.
Good luck hun!
Do NOT worry about tomorrow…today has enough worry of it's own! Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy. Go to your birthing classes and learn how to breath properly, focus, etc. Once they lay your little bundle in your arms…all will be awesome!
Hugs, andrea
Oh, it's not crazy at all! I've done it three times, and I remember the first time being terrified
My advice: don't let anyone tell you horror stories until AFTER you've given birth.
Focus on keeping relaxed. Remind yourself that each contraction brings you closer to the baby. Good luck!
One of my daughters has already told me the same thing – she doesn't want to have babies if it hurts!
The anticipation and joy of bringing a new baby into the world will make it all worthwhile! I know you'll do a great job!
I used to tell my parents the SAME THING! I didn't wanna have kiddos because of my fear. Well… I've had 4 kiddos now and I can say I am more scared of the little, bitty IV needle instead of full blown labor. Hehe… Pathetic? Yah…
You will just know what to do when the time comes. You will also be incredibly surprised how much you can handle when the time comes. Most importantly, you will completely forget any horror you may have had to endure to get your new little love into the world as soon as you look at them. Enjoy your pregnancy for now and let the delivery come when it comes. You will do great!
Get use to the fact that you will have several people "looking" at you while you give birth. Its just a normal part of the whole thing.