Special needs parenting is HARD. Trying to keep your marriage alive while parenting special needs kids can be even harder.
It’s a well-known fact in the special needs community that divorce is higher among special needs families. I don’t think this happens on purpose, but more because of how stressful it is to parents a special needs child and all that comes with it. But in my opinion, these statistics nor parenting a special needs child should prevent couples from trying to keep their marriage alive.
Marriage is an important aspect of parenting. Your children need both of you to love and show love each other. They need that stability. While I understand that every marriage is different and that in some cases divorce may be necessary, the majority of couples can work through their problems. They just have to put in the hard work necessary to keep their marriage alive.
7 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Alive
“Effective communication is critical to the success of every marriage. A married couple who knows how to communicate effectively with one another reduces their chance of getting divorced.” – Why Every Couple Should Learn How to Communicate
As I’m sure you’ve already heard many times, communication is so important in marriage. But what does that look like for special needs parents? For us, it means making time to tell each other about our day, about what’s going on with our two special needs kids, and about life.
Sometimes our schedules are so crazy we don’t get to talk much, but I make sure to communicate with my husband about medical decisions, about our kids, and any other important things. Once things have calmed down a bit I make sure we have it least one night where we come together and just talk and catch up. It may sound hard, but it’s worth the effort to communicate and ask your spouse what’s going on and how they are doing.
When we love someone, we have to be willing to sacrifice or give up something for them. Sometimes that thing may be our own personal desires. It’s hard to look past our own selfish wants, but marriage is a partnership and that means we need to keep in mind our spouse’s needs and desires and sometimes even put those first.
Sacrifice might mean giving up what little time you do have to spend with your spouse or it might mean making an effort even when your spouse is not. Whatever your sacrifice may be, it shows that you are working to love your spouse through those hard times.