Change of Date
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When you find out that your husband is deploying, you have that date stuck in your head. You think about that date and it’s constantly on your mind. You prepare yourself mentally and emotionally, and when that date gets closer you do everything you can to make the most of the time left. But when that date changes, then that is when the mind game starts. You get that roller coaster of emotions.
I am one of those people who likes to be prepared. I have to know what is going on ahead of time, I have to have a plan. Military life is the total opposite of that and it has caused me to realize that I can’t always be a planner. I won’t always know what’s going to happen because things change- especially in the military!
The goodbyes have been said, the bags have been packed, and last minute preparations were in place, but my husband’s deployment date has changed several times in the past two days. Not earlier like I had almost thought to expect but to a date over a week later. It’s not that far I know, but to prepare yourself and spend all those last moments doing what you can to make them last, it’s almost as though I don’t know what to do with the extra time.
I had it all planned out, the sitter, the friend coming so I didn’t have to drive back alone, but it’s all changed now. I am thankful for a little bit more time together, but now all my plans have gone away. Two verses come to mind in this situation: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts,” and “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” God knows what’s going on and he knows how I feel. He is here even in this, even in the emotions I am feeling.
So to everyone who will still see us around, he’s still leaving, just not the date expected. Thank you all for your prayers.
Hey, I really liked your post on Newlywed’s Bliss and thought I’d check out your blog. I love it! My sister married an Air Force guy in February, moved to ND with him, and they are now expecting twin girls. It’s great to see your perspective on things, and I’ll definitely be forwarding them to my sister!
Thank you so much! Sounds like you sister is on a wonderful roller coaster ride! 🙂 What base are they at, do you know? I have an Air Force wife friend who is up there. Thanks so much for your sweet comment! 🙂
They’re at Minot Air Force Base.
Oh ok I see. My friend is close to their I believe but stationed at a different base. 🙂
So happy for the extra bit of time you two get to have. Savor every moment : )
Thank you. We will! 🙂
Enjoy all of the extra time you two are getting together! I’ll be thinking about you and praying for you guys! Do you know about how long his deployment is?
Thanks girl, I appreciate the encouragement and prayers!
What a bummer! I know it feels like you’re expected to be happy about the extra time, but really, it’s SO MUCH EASIER when they’re just gone.
My friend Michele actually drove her husband to the base, said their tearful goodbyes, drove home, and made it through the first day when her husband called and said he was still here; a jet was broken, could she come pick him up?
And the kicker is- she told him NO! She said she couldn’t go through the emotional stress of picking him up and saying goodbye again, so he stayed at the BOQ on base. 😀
You’re not alone!
Yes, that is how I feel. I already had my plans for the week after and what I was going to do to keep busy. I am still have a hard time wrapping my mind around that he’s not leaving on that day after thinking about it for so long. Wow… about your friend Michele, I am not sure what I would do in a situation like that. I don’t think Jon would be happy with me if I did that. But I totally understand why she did. Jon is having a hard time understanding why I am upset, he is just happy to spend more time with us, which I am glad for that as well. I am sure Adam is too!
Still praying. I can understand not enjoying the change of plans (I’m the same way), but I’m glad you have a bit more time.
Thanks girl, I appreciate it!
As a veteran at TDYs and deployments, the changes, even what seem to be good ones, are the worst. I actually had the same experience someone mentioned above. I dropped off my husband, went home, had my mini-breakdown, and then he called to say they weren’t leaving that day and he was on the way home. That night was harder than the night before! You emotionally prepare and your mind is ready to just get everything started, even though there is a part of you that says “Thank goodness for some more time.” The war within is difficult and difficult for your other half to understand.
Wow Becky, I am so sorry you had to go through that. Thank you so much for understanding! My husband doesn’t get it, bless his hear, but it’s so nice to know there are people out there who do!
No sorry is necessary – it was a hard night but one that I still cherish and that I learned from. I always thought to myself before that “One more day would make this easier.” No, it won’t. There are not enough days to make any of it easier. Plus, If there is anything else I have learned through all the separations, changes, and homecomings, it’s that I can make it through whatever is thrown at me. And, I can come out of all of it as a stronger, better woman.
Thank you so much what you said is beautiful.
Some times we plan, but GOd has other plans….Sit back and treasure every extra minute as a gift from God. Life is too short….It is hard to feel out of control, but never forget that God has not let go of you or your family for even a minute. He is still in control and watching you tight. Enjoy this family time God has given you as a special gift from God…..And….your pics are great….YOU look really great!!!! 🙂
Thank you so much for the encouragement Amy, I appreciate it. And thanks, I just love the pictures, I am so glad for the opportunity to get them done!
I bet most people wouldn’t understand this, so it’s good you wrote about it. Plans changing is hard, even when it sounds like a good thing to have a little more time together. Also then there are a lot of questions about if he’s really leaving. It’s hard to let go of things and trust that God has a plan for us, isn’t it? I struggle with that daily. I love that Joseph Campbell quote! (Visiting from Comment Love Day)
Yes, I a lot of people who don’t know anything about the military wouldn’t understand, I used to be one of them before I became a military wife! 🙂 It’s so nice to have that community of military wives who do understand though. It IS hard to let go, I always want to be in control and then realize that it’s God that needs to be and not me. Thanks so much for stopping by! 🙂
Hi, just found you via Comment Love Day and I just love your blog. Such a lovely, clean and elegant layout-I have subcribed! Would appreciate if you followed back?
Have such a wonderful day! Such a big (and new!) fan
Thanks so much! 🙂 Courtney @ http://www.amplified-designs.net/ did it for me. Definitely worth the money! Thanks for stopping by!
It must be so hard to deal with such changes, Kathryn. Especially when you had everything planned already. But it’s good that you’ll be able to spend more time with your hubby. Keep praying and draw strength from God. And don’t forget to breathe when things become overwhelming. 🙂
Take care, Kathryn! Thanks a lot for dropping by my blog! 🙂
Yes, I am glad to have more time with him. 🙂 Thanks for the encouragement, the forgetting to breathe thing – that’s a good one! 🙂 Thanks for the sweet comment!
You have such a cute blog!
I couldn’t imagine being married to a man in the military, you are very tough to be able to go through all of this. I definitely can relate to having to say goodbye & plans changing though, and it is very tough. It is really difficult to have already made peace with a date & then have it changed, I know I am horrible with change & I really need to fix that! You blog is so great to read & adorable I will definitely check back later!! Visit from FTLOB & thank you for the great comment you left me!!
Thanks so much! Courtney @ http://www.amplified-designs.net/ did it for me. Definitely worth the money! 🙂
Appreciate that comment. Always nice to know I am not alone int he whole planning thing. Being a military wife is hard, but soo worth it! Thanks so much for stopping by!
Oh gosh, I’d find this so hard to deal with. Like you I am a planner, and find it quite hard for plans not to go my way!
Visiting from comment love day http://www.mummybrain.com
Yes, it’s soo hard sometimes! Thanks for stopping by, I appreciate it! Will be coming by yours to visit soon!