Moms: You Choose Love
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People always tell me, “I don’t know how you do it” or “I could never do what you do” in relation to my two special needs kids, how crazy our life is, and our month-long hospital visit with my daughter.
I have been thinking about those statements a lot lately. So much so, that when I was talking to my counselor recently about this I said, “it’s not like I have a choice, I do it because I have to, because this is my life.”
But the she said something that surprised me… “You always have a choice. You choose to do this. Don’t you?”
And then I had to think about it… Did I really have a choice? Did I specifically choose to get up each day, no matter how exhausting it all is, and just do it?
I thought of all the heart-breaking stories I’ve heard through the news. Stories about mothers leaving their babies to die in their cribs. Mothers who tried to drown their own children. Mothers who one day up and left their family and never came back. Mothers who chose not to do it anymore.
So then I wondered, why?
Why do I chose to continue to do it no matter what? Why when each day can be frustrating? Why on the days I barely get enough sleep to make it through the day? Why when watching my daughter have to feed through a tube? Why on the days where I can’t bear to see my daughter choke and retch over and over again and not have any answers? Why?
And the answer came to me slow and soft:
The reason I do the things I do the reason I continue to fight, is the love I have for my family and the love they have for me. That love binds us together and gives me determination that no matter what, we will get through this.
Moms: I see you out there struggling with the day-to-day things. The tantrums, the attitudes, the sibling fights, the messy house, the dishes in the sink, the appointments, and the mundane. It’s all so overwhelming. But you continue to fight.
Special Needs Moms: I see you out there struggling with the doctors appointments, hospital visits, therapy visits, the meltdowns, the tube feedings, the sensory overloads. It’s all so overwhelming. But you continue to fight.
Moms: I see you. You have determination. You have fight in you. You have love. You have things that no one else but YOU have and YOU are the perfect mom for your kids.
Don’t give up. Whatever your day brings, whatever your life is, don’t give up. Continue fighting. Continue choosing love.
Even though you’re in the thick of it right now, I hope you know what an inspiration you are to other moms. Your attitude—even when you admit to feeling broken—is humbling and encouraging. And you’re right. We choose this lifestyle because of love.
Thank you so much for your sweet words. I don’t even know what to say except these are some of the hardest times of my life. I just take it one day a time, and I’m so glad I have this blog as my outlet and to help others too. Thanks for commenting!
Thank you for the constant encouragement!
I’m so glad it was encouraging to you!
Just wanted to pop in to say that I had just finished a fairly crappy day when I read this last night. It really helped me change my thinking, and today if off to a much, much better start. Thanks, girl!
So glad it was encouraging Erica and so sorry it was a bad day. Glad the next day was better and hope you weeks stays that way too! Thanks for commenting!
Kathryn, I really needed to read this today. Thank you!
So glad it was encouraging girl. Love you!