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Lately, I have been thinking a lot about friendship. Ever since I was a little girl, I have had problems making friends. I have known a lot of people over the years, but when I stop to think about it, how many of these people can I actually call real friends? Even in college, I would make friends only to realize that I was the only one making the effort.
When I stopped asking people to hang out or do something with me, no one really cared, they went on with their own life, like we never even had a friendship. I still have people that I hang out with and call friends, but I know that when I move again, I will have to start all over, and that most of these people I will never hear from again. It used to bother me, it bothered me a lot. It has been hanging over me my whole life, why do people not like me? I try to be a good friend, but it never seems to mean anything to the people I am friends with.
Two years ago, I came to a conclusion. I was at college and I had just lost a friend of mine, because we had had a fight about some things. That summer, I agonized as to why this was happening. I cried and cried because I was so sad to keep losing friends. But God really showed me something that summer. That I do not need friends to live a happy life serving him. He was all I needed. God showed me that he good be the best friend any girl could ever ask for. He is there 24/7 and is willing to listen to any problem we have. I was amazed… I had heard that God was my friend, but it was like something really awakened in me. My whole life I had been depending on friends, thinking that if I did not have many or any at all, I was nothing. I had been leaning on them instead of God!
I am not perfect, I still sometimes wish I could find that “best friend” that most people have. But I always have God and I know that He is all I need to get me through. He is the friend I can lean on at any time.
“What a friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer!
Oh, what peace we often forfeit,
Oh, what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry Everything to God in prayer!”
God has so many things to show us, we just have to open our eyes, and let Him show us the truth…