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Do you ever want to be that other person? The person who is the super mom and can do 95 things on top of having 6 kids and having a husband who is deployed. The person with all the friends in the world they could possibly want who are always writing on their facebook wall how much they mean to them and how great of a person they are. The person with the perfect life, great friends, great marriage, great family. The person who has everything together, who is always positive and never had a bad day in their life. The person who is the perfect wife, having the house clean and spotless and having dinner on the table everyday at exactly 6pm. The person who has an awesome personality, is funny, witty, and charming all at once. That person.
I know things aren’t always what they seem, but when they seem that way it’s hard to think about anything else. I want to be that person. I want to have it all together, have good friends who have my back, and never have a bad day to talk about. I want to be beautiful and feel beautiful, love and be loved. I want to be the best mom that I can, the best wife that I can, the best friend that I can be.
But I just feel pulled in so many different directions. I feel like I do so much, put so much out there and in the end it never matters because there is always someone prettier, smarter, funnier, and just all around better person than I am. There is so much to do, and never enough time. Something always gets brushed aside. How can I keep it all together and still be that person? The person everyone wants to be? How can I still be me?
I know what you mean! I even dreamt this morning that my husband was leaving me because I didn't do the washing enough, and he always had to get up to Jonathan during the night. Both of which aren't true for the record 😉
But just goes to show that no matter how much I do, I always feel like I'm not doing enough or doing my best!
You aren't alone in wanting to be That Person 🙂
There are two reasons I quit trying to be that person.
1) It is my experience that some of those crazy not together moments can be the most cherished.
2) It is much too stressful to try to be perfect. Life has plenty of stresses without adding more unneeded stress upon ourselves.
Love the post though!
Edit: Not that I don't wish I was more together. I do and it is so hard to not want to be perfect. But I do the best I can.
Wow! I feel the same way ALL the time! Especially the part about being pulled in so many directions. Sometimes it is really hard to stay grounded and focused on the things that really matter.
Thanks for such a great post and for showing that you're human!
girl, i know exactly what you mean!
but always remember, you ARE beautiful and you ARE loved, You were made in the image of God!
The church has done women a terrible disservice. So many books on Christian femininity, have portrayed the ultimate woman as being something of a Christian Stepford wife. Dinner is perfectly cooked, the house is spotless, and never a harsh word crosses their mouth. It's incredibly hard to be That Person.
I can't be That Person. I'm too much of well..a SpitFire. All of my emotions are fiercely passionate. I love strong, I'm angry strong, and when I'm sad, I'm deeply sad. I have to think I was designed that way for a reason. So now, I just want to be That SpitFire. The me God intends me to me. (Now if I can just figure out what that was…lol)
(Hello! I've been reading your blog for a month or so, and thought I should introduce myself briefly before I posted a comment – I'm Larissa, Alyce's younger sister).
I'm not a wife or mother, but I still want to be that person. It's a real struggle, and it's only be God's grace that I'm not overcome by it. You're not alone!
I'm right there with you. It is so frustrating when other people seem to have it all together and you feel like you are floundering. But I firmly believe that bad days are universal and no one is perfect. We just gotta keep on keepin on. 🙂
This was awesome! I feel the same way. Life would be so much better if I quit comparing myself to other people…
It's so easy to compare ourselves to others and feel like we don't measure up. Awhile ago I decided that what I do is my best and it's exactly what it needs to be, so I try to avoid comparing myself to others. I simply see it all as we're just living different lives.
In one of my Bible studies we're reading a book by Lysa Terkeurst called "Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl." In the book she talks about how we compare ourselves and how we wish to have "what she has," but we need to realize that if we want the good we'd also have to take the bad. For example, wanting a marriage like "hers" would require taking the hardships she went through and the journey she took to get to that point. I don't even know if that makes sense, but Lysa has many more nuggets of goodness in this book. I'd definitely recommend it.
FB is like many things….easy to put up the appearance of a perfect life, but if you were to walk in her shoes for a day, you'd probably see anything but. It's fun to put up the nice things of our day, especially when they go right. Often it's what we don't see that speaks volumes and if we could see her heart, you'd probably see sadness, discouragement, loneliness, etc.