Choose Three Things

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Because time is short before my husband deploys I will be having a few people guest post for me so that I can spend more time with my husband before he leaves. Today, I would like you to welcome Paula from Hopeful Future. Her post today is something I definitely want to do. I feel as though I almost could have written it myself!

I don’t know about you, but I know that I have a lot I need to work on. I’m not just talking about laundry and vacuuming (though I have a lot of those needing done too)! I am talking about working on myself. I am not the woman I want to be, and I am actually pretty far from being who I want to be. I think if we are honest with ourselves, a lot of us could agree.

In the past I would look at all of the “stuff” (issues, baggage, drama, whatever you want to call it) and get really discouraged and down on myself. If you try to look at everything that you want to change about yourself all at once it can be very intimidating, and if you are like me, you want to just throw in the towel right now! Honestly, my family was my inspiration to keep trying to be a “better me.” I want to be a better, more godly wife and mother, so I am going to keep trying, but I knew there had to be a better way to work on it.

In the past I had just been looking at this mountain of things I want to change and sort of hoping I would get better about them. Sometimes I would pray that God would help me be “better” or “become a good wife.” There were so many things piled on top of each other that I could improve on that I was too overwhelmed by everything to make much progress with any one thing.

About a month ago I started doing something new. I went to Target and picked up a cute little notebook. Then I started by writing out 3 things that I was going to work on about myself that week. Then that week I would think about, pray about, find solutions to and focus on those things. At the end of the week I picked up the notebook again and was pleasantly surprised to find that I had accomplished my goal! I had fixed all 3 of the things on my list. I was so excited and energized to write down 3 more!

One of the things I love about this is that it encourages me. I never would have been proud of myself for accomplishing those things if that had not been my goal for the week, I would have still been stuck looking at all the other things I have yet to fix. But instead I was able to stop and thank God for giving me the strength to fix these things. I became more confident because I know that I am moving forward towards being a more godly woman.

I don’t always end up completing all 3 things on my list every week, some things will probably perpetually stay on the list for weeks, and possibly months, but the important thing is moving forward, and working on them. I love looking through my notebook, it is encouraging to see the things that I have succeeded on, and humbling to see the ones I am still working on. This little project has helped keep me accountable to myself that I really am working on the things that I need to be working on, and that I am moving forward.

I encourage you to try it if you face a similar “mountain” like I do. Here are some suggestions if you do decide to try join me for this project:

• Get a new cute notebook! – There is just something about a cute notebook that is fresh and exciting! I am always excited to write in a notebook that is cute, and my little one keeps me wanting to write in it and helps keep my project fun!

• Don’t overwhelm yourself – Some weeks if you are working on something really tough, you may not need to put 3 things. Some weeks just working on 1 is more than enough. And that is okay!

• Use this to encourage yourself as you grow, don’t let yourself get discouraged if you don’t accomplish something in 7 days, just make your next list shorter and include the ones you didn’t finish from last week this week!

• Remember that this is for your growth, even if you can’t say you completely ‘succeeded’ in everything on your list, you can probably say that you have grown in each area, and that is still a huge success!

• Every few weeks I will get my husband’s input. I will ask questions like “what is something I do that makes you feel loved?” or “What is something I did this week that was hard on you?” or “What would you say is the main thing I should be working on in my life right now?” then I try to incorporate his answer into one of my goals for the week. If you ask those questions be ready for an honest answer. No getting angry! It is hard to hear sometimes, but can prove to be very helpful!

• Don’t try to tackle 3 huge things at once!  I  will often put something big that I am struggling with along with two smaller things. Or one internal problem and two external.

Examples:
1. Work on being more content. (big/internal)
2. Send my hubby an encouraging text AT LEAST once a day, thanking him for something and uplifting him. (small/external)
3. Vacuum consistently. (small/external)

The first is an issue of the heart and is the most difficult. The second two are smaller and just things I need to commit to and be disciplined about doing. Remember to keep reading through your entire notebook every week, to remind yourself to keep up with the things you have already improved on.  Have fun! This is meant to be an encouraging and uplifting project. If it ever stops being that, stop and find something else that works better for you!

In case you are wondering what types of “things” I am referring to; here is a list of some of the things that have been on my lists, are still there, or will be soon:
1. Contentment.
2. Patience.
3. Plan a fun date for me and my hubby every week.
4. Be in a good mood when hubby comes home from work.
5. Eat properly.
6. Stop trying to “read into” everything my hubby says. (Ouchie, that’s a big one)
7. Read a Bible story to my son every night. (Ashamed that this one has to be on the list)
8. Drink 6 glasses of water a day.
9. Exercise 5 days this week.
10. Find time to read the Bible daily.
11. Every time I think about ‘person X’ pray about the situation and ask God to help me truly forgive them. (This one keeps coming up!)
12. Keep bathroom clean.
13. Dress nicer for my husband.
14. Don’t speak out in anger.
15. Live today, not yesterday.
16. Stop worrying!!!
17. Be more cheerful in the morning.
18. Stop gossiping.
19. Stop feeding anger.
20. Stop feeding resentment.
21. Forgiveness.
22. Make my home a place of peace.
23. Less stress.
24. More trust.
Often times I will do things like:
25. Work on number 20 again.

These are just some that I have been working on (or need to be), and there are SO MANY MORE that will be going on my list!

What about you? Are there any ways that you have been working on improving yourself lately? I would love to hear about them!

My name is Paula, I am 21 years old and a proud wife and mommy. I married my best friend when I was 18 and we became parents to a sweet baby boy last year. Our adventures learning about life and love can be found at www.hopfulfuture.blogspot.com.